Monday, July 5, 2010

X-Men Meets Alien? (Splice Review)

Ever wonder what would happen if you turned a guinnea pig inside-out, made it the size of an angry beaver, and gave it a stinger that could come out its mouth?

Neither had I, but apparently someone out there did, as this is basically the first thing you see in what I will admit has probably been the most mis-judged movie on my 2010 preview list thus far: Splice.  This is one of those movies that is probably better the less you know about it, so if you have any inclination of seeing Splice, then I suggest that you don't read on beyond the end of this paragraph.  For you, I will simply say that I found it to be a surprisingly well-made movie despite Adrien Brody's naked behind.

For those of you NOT interested in seeing Splice (and I suspect that's most of you), here's the rundown.  Two scientists - Clive (Adrien Brody) and Elsa (Sarah Polley) - are experts at splicing genes, and together they develop a new animal out of the DNA of various creatures and plants.  From this animal they aim to solve virtually all medicinal problems in farm animals.  Naturally, Clive and Elsa wish to extend this research to humans so that they can find cures for cancer and birth defects and all those other fun problems caused by heavy drinking during pregnancy and/or extensive inbreeding.  This, however, is quickly shot down by the company funding their research since it would be too similar to cloning, so our rebellious scientists at the NERD compound (seriously, that's its name) take matters into their own hands and splice a human gene with the inside-out guinnea pig monstrosity they had already created.  A creature is born, and voila!  You have Splice!

The surface plot is simple enough, in the way that Mary Shelley's Frankenstein is simple.  Doctors create misunderstood monster.  Monster makes life difficult for creators.  Things don't turn out so well.  The end.  But Splice, at its heart, isn't at all about Dren (the creature).  It's about Elsa, the lady splicer.  Never before have I seen a film that so expertly picks apart the psyche of a broken woman.  Elsa had a dysfunctional childhood.  Her mom was crazy.  What makes this movie so brilliant in this respect is that it doesn't explicitly tell you any more than that.  There's a line or two said in passing that suggest this, and at one point you see Elsa's childhood room (little more than a flea-ridden mattress on the floor), but that's it.  All the rest you gleam from Elsa's actions.  Her character was so well-written, and the movie's depiction of her so well-filmed, that I got chills.  Her character is so complex, yet perfectly-portrayed, that I could spent pages and pages talking about her, so just take my word for it: in terms of character development, I don't know if I've ever seen a film do a better job.  Ever.  From the way she dominates her relationships to her adamant stance against having children to her obsession with her work...  It got a touch disturbing at times.  But such is this movie: complex, psychologically beautiful, and disturbing.

Splice is hard to watch at times.  It's sort of a thriller, but not really.  This isn't like Alien, where you have a monster slowly picking off castmembers until there's only two or three left.  In Splice, the entire cast list is only about six people deep.  Splice is more psychological drama than it is science fiction thriller, despite what the trailers would have you believe.  I suspect that many pubescent boys went in expecting copious amounts of bloodshed and death.  Splice delivers on both, but perhaps not as much as they would have liked.  It does, however, present you with a naked female mutant in what may actually be the most bizarre sex scene I've yet encountered (and that includes the ones from MacGruber), so I'm sure their feelings were mixed.

To sum up, Splice is NOT a prederatorial thriller where a dozen hapless scientists are slowly picked off one by one.  See this film if you are a psychology major and don't mind some blood, creepily attractive mutant women, or, in a similar vein, Adrien Brody's ass.  Do not see this film if you don't appreciate seeing animals die onscreen, small Canadian casts, hopeless endings, crazy people, tense scenes, the birthing process, inside-out guinea pig creatures that look more like flesh pillows than animals, wide-set eyes, transgenders, rape, or if you generally possess a sunny disposition.  You might just come out of the whole affair as messed up as Elsa - or, at the very least, (in the words of Prince Humperdink) very put out.

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